Afraid Of The Very Thing I Want

jessica-simien-blogger copyHave you ever heard of the Jonah Complex? You can think of it as a personal growth inhibitor. People who experience this have a fear of success or a fear of reaching their personal best in different areas of their lives. You wouldn’t necessarily experience this fear your entire life, it comes and goes as you are forced to make life changing decisions.

It’s triggered by things like making a career change, deciding to go back to school for another degree, auditioning for a role or trying out for a team, committing to a relationship or moving away from your hometown. On one hand you want to go for it because you know it’ll bring you a level of happiness and fulfillment that you crave but on the other hand, going for it comes with consequences as does everything in life. It’s like a protective mechanism that kicks in when you begin to think about the negative things that could come from pursuing an opportunity like failure, not living up to the expectations people have of you, doubting that what you want is even possible, etc.

In my case, I’m afraid of being in love.

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Nail Color Of The Week: Sally Hansen’s Strobe Light + Wet n Wild’s Private Viewing


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100 In A Year, Task 66: Visit The Zoo


Task 66: Visit the zoo
Completed: February 14, 2015

On Valentine’s Day this year I took my two love bugs to the zoo. The weather was so beautiful I couldn’t resist spending some time outdoors.

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I Hosted My First Event In Hattiesburg + God Answered My Prayer

IMG_8060April 3, 2015
2:08 AM

I can’t believe I’m still awake and on the computer at this time of night. Well, it’s morning but still dark so I consider it night time LOL. Anyway, I’m on a NATURAL HIGH (pun intended) because my natural hair tour has gotten kicked off to an amazing start!

I was able to complete two of my 100 In A Year tasks tonight: (1) Host an event in Hattiesburg and (2) Document at least 1 answered prayer per month…this is my April prayer and it’s only the 3rd. Look at God.

The event that I hosted was’s Kinks & Curls on Campus: A Natural Hair Tour. Our first stop of two this semester was at the University of Southern Mississippi and our host/partnering organization was I.D.E.A.L. Women. You can read a full recap of the event by clicking here but the best part is not the event recap…it’s the praying, waiting and seeing your prayer answered recap that you really need to read!

Keep reading for a lil’ dose of encouragement…  Continue reading

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Know Yourself

Photo on 3-27-15 at 3.40 PM #6 - jessicasimien - the jessica diaries
March 27, 2015
2:27 PM

I don’t know if I’m a weirdo or if I’m just finally beginning to be myself at all times. I kinda feel like a weirdo and everyone is looking at me like I am but it’s cool LOL.

At this moment I’m literally sitting on a park bench in downtown Hattiesburg, writing to the sound of Lauryn Hill singing in my headphones. Every driver that passes by strains their neck to look at the black girl dressed like a Black Panther with her MacBook in her lap. All the male city workers are gawking, smiling and waving…I’m smiling back with each worker giving me a boost of confidence. One even wrote his number on a piece of paper and had his partner bring it to me. *giggles*  Continue reading

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